It's been 3 moths since I last poured out my heart and updated my host of followers (hey Phil & Liz) on what has been taking place in Bensville.
I'm sad to say that my professional wrestling career has not taken off. My application to All-Star Wrestling School in Liverpool was not accepted. I sent some wrestling home videos to the developmental arm of the WWE (World Wrestling Entertainment, formerly WWF, for anyone sad enough not to love wrestling) so they could see my moves for themselves, but they must be busy, as they haven't got back to me yet.
Anyone with less self confidence would probably give up and spiral into despair, but I'm mentally strong so will keep pressing on towards my ultimate goal of Championship Gold around my waist, and shaven, tanned oiled pectoral muscles.
I bought a sat nav about 2 months ago, only to discover on it's maiden voyage that the cigarette lighter socket in my car does not work. For all intensive purposes it is there only for decoration. I discovered this moderately important fact on my way to visit my sister in Eastbourne.
Before continuing this story I feel compelled to explain that my sister is not 82 years old, even though she resides in Eastbourne. I know, it's baffling.
Anyway. I approached a large roundabout with 5 major exits, and at this juncture my satellite navigation device switched itself to what can only be described as "off mode".
Due to my Y Chromosone I was able to navigate safely across the roundabout and on to my final destination, but that's hardly the point.
You'll be pleased to know that my daughter (now 15 months old) is now walking and talking. I say talking, to be more accurate she makes a lot of noises, and can say cheese when confronted with a picture of cheese. If we're honest there are some adults who are not much more advanced lingusitically than this, so I feel justified in stating for all the world (Phil & Liz) to read that she is indeed talking.
Tomorrow I'm going to attempt to hold my breath for 2 minutes and 10 seconds - a personal best. Wish me luck.
